Flashing Lights

Again, I was alone even in the pool with my camp mates.  Creepy that my shadow continued to lurk in the back of my thoughts reminders of my inner introverted self. I thought over the few weeks it had finally disappeared.  Perhaps I was destined to be the lonely kid in the middle of the earth.  Was that my place forever?  I floated back to the haunting words that halted me from moving forward because there was always someone else that already claimed the spot.  So became stuck, even in the blooming pool afraid to move away from the sides and stand firmly without the gliding board.  Funny, I found myself clinging like a monkey while making my way around to the deep end, but never alone in the middle.  Tired from my ritual, I climbed out of the pool dripping wet.  Strangely, I decided at that moment the need to go home.  It would be now or never I coaxed to myself.  All in all, I was born  a nose-bleeder so that became my crutch.  With no one around to watch my actions, I reached into my mind and with a great force blew my nose over and over until it bleed.  It was if I was part of the X-men with powers to make it happen (do not try this at home).  To my embarrassment and surprise it worked!  It started like a volcanic burst of flowing lava oozing out of control.  Immediately, I was rushed to the nurse's station that was a few feet away.  She placed an already made cold ice-pack on the bridge of my nose with no difficulties then dialed the phone to call my home.  I thought my plan was well-thought until the expression on the nurse's face told the outcome.  As instructed, I would remain at camp like the frozen ice on my nose.  Ugh!  My ultimate deceitful plan failed. So the last remaining camp days forced me to continue with my life.  I learned that some things are not worth the headache of trying to achieve, such as a nosebleed.  On my last night at camp, I stared up into the green pale ceiling.  Will all my thoughts be revealed?  I  wondered if the tent would share my ability to read The Hobbit (by JRR Tolkien) and dictionary (from beginning to the end), write poetry, and admire nature.  Also my musical interests of The Average White Band, soft rock and Beethoven music will be let out like Pandora's box. Also, my  gifted photographic memory that earned my endless spelling bee awards and not taking history notes--thank you Mr. Spearnack from my 7th grade class.  Surely the next camper will know my thoughts while laying on this bunk.  Immediately, I became jealous and full of betrayal.  My journey was ending just as I became comfortable with sharing the echoes in my mind   I packed my last clothing neatly back into the belly of the beast (bulging blue suitcase) with no mothballs.  Next, I sealed the last envelope enclosed with last night's notes to myself.  On the day of departure I hugged Jacky so tight and boarded the yellow school bus back to town.  Strangely, as I sat on the bus a tree leaf drifted into the window and landed on my lap.  I think my leaves did finally grow.

A Mother's Touch

Have you ever wrestled at night in your sleep only to wake with a layer of the sheet wrapped around your face?  Well, it must of been a good fight.  Fortunately, I woke up with the sun tickling my nose with its flashing rays that ran across my eyes.  So I climbed down my bunk to gather my clothes and head to the bathing house.  In particular, the bathe house was in another logging building not too far from our sleeping tent.  There were a few sinks and shower stalls with a spotted mirror near the exit door.  Jacky was always on guard which gave some of us girls more time to sing while we dressed and reloaded our toiletries back into our pails.  Earlier, I lost my footing and sailed right into the belly of the beast, resulting with the suitcase landing on its back, and I on my behind.  It was a fairly loud thump as if some wrestler from WWE decided to finally take it down.  Even though I tried my best to keep it out of everyone's way, including my own.  Anyhow, I zipped it open and was quickly greeted by the familiar smell of scented mothballs that my mother swore by religiously.  With a quick peak over my shoulder, I decided to throw the rest of the gagging pebbled stones out from beneath my clothes.   After, I fished out my red, blue and white bathing suit because we were scheduled for swimming lessons, yet I was not too thrilled about attending.  Last week when I tried to swim the chlorine soaked my head and the water flooded my nose.   Relentlessly I begged Jacky (the counselor) to excuse me from the activity, which she comfortably denied.  Her charismatic and gentle motherly nature reminded me to be a steady team player as my journey will come to a close in a few days. Therefore, I smothered my sniffles back down my throat and joined the line with my camp mates.  Overall, the walk was brief as I could see the swimming pool area approaching us.  Nevertheless, I picked up my slow gait, however the girls ran down the hill laughing and giggling like a bubbly brook.  My heart was thumping like the beat of an ancient Djembe African drum as if the cheetah was on the run. My emotions were positively high as I felt like a tree without leaves.

Magical Moments

I continued to write letters to myself quietly unzipping the belly of my suitcase to shove the envelope into the back pockets like the invisible ghost.  I have no idea why my mother gave me stationary, as I wrote once back home with  no returns.  The camp activities allowed me to release the artist, reader, writer, poet, lyricist and empathizer that was permanently stamped inside of me.  Therefore,  my work became a marvel, as I surprised myself by plummeting creatively into every lesson that was being taught.  Sometimes, the output would amaze or startle the teacher who gave a sigh or a gracious bow of approval like a Lady-in-waiting who held her skirt.  Finally, my mind and thoughts were free like a queen who ruled the high seas.  I welcomed visits from the night as I would lie on my back and wish for the performance of the "dancing" spiders to trickle above my face.  But as I became comfortable with them and the darkness at night the battery and flashlight was reserved only for emergencies.  So there was no performers, unless I gave them a stage with a spotlight.  One late night I could no longer contain myself from my earlier cups of drinking fluids and had no choice but to venture alone to find the camp's business house.  So I climbed out of my top bunk with the yellow canister flashlight in tow.  You can hear the crunching of sticks and rolling of little pebbled stones as my blue cotton rubber sole slippers found its footing on the walked path.   As I trailed along a lime-green snake quietly slithered across the path less than 4 inches away.  I stopped and admired its glowing skin from under my shining flashlight.  As I exhaled, my fear loosened its relentless grip from my caged ribs as I became rescued by courage.  I was no longer afraid of the unknown.  Soon after my mission was accomplished, I exited the tiny canister,  slide the hinge to the ancient wooden door and returned back onto the path to the camp tent.  No one missed my presence as I slithered back into my bunk like a snake.  Nighty night.

Courage Took Over

After breakfast we hiked up a dented hill and crossed a monkey bridge.  It was a muscled tight rope with arms that bonded together as one by one we walked across the bubbling stream.  I looked down and thought I saw an image of a water goddess waving as we held onto the ropes.  But it was probably my imagination.  We landed safely and again Jacky took a headcount.  We ate the prepared bologna and cheese sandwiches (that finally began to grow on me) and sipped from a water canister.  Next we were instructed to get into a canoe to row back over the river from where we first came.  My knees began to buckle and my heart began to swell.  The only water I ever floated was in a bathtub and that never crossed the English Channel, much less a trickle of outdoor water.  I began to sob endlessly, as Jacky coaxed me with soothing words that she would be my guide and won't leave my side.  All the other campers that crossed with the assistant counselor waited patiently for our venture to begin.  It was probably how some animals felt while filing into Noah's Ark wishing their fears away.  I climbed into the canoe, yet face still wet with tears and a lifejacket tightened like a  gasping turtleneck sweater.  My memoirs began to float back home reflecting how I was instructed to pull the harsh winter sweater with dismay over my head and bundle of thick reddish-brown hair.  Soon afterward, a few seconds of calmness appeared.  Jacky was like an orchestra conductor, tapping the side of the canoe and gently pushing the oars into the sand to float us into the water.  It was so peaceful with trickles as she steadily lifted her head like a swan floating us down the Nile River.  I took both oars followed her instructions to move my arms gracefully.  The canoe came alive shining proudly like a knight's armor.  As the canoe became more visible to the other side of the shore, I carefully peeked like a prowler to see how far my journey had begun.  Finally, I was proud to make such an accomplishment that was rightfully earned, no one to judge only with applause and no one can ever take that moment away.  I tucked this into my thoughts forever.  Now and then I reflect of that moment, so I decided to share with you today.  Thank you Jacky.

Surviving on Marshmallows

The headcount was completed as every camper's name was confirmed.  Thank goodness that none of us were missing.  Business centers were dug out a few feet away from the campground with a reminder to remain in our clothes overnight.  Like dwarves off to work, we hammered the metal stakes into the ground and looped knots over it to post the mini tents.  The day was fighting for the light as Jacky motioned the group into a circle.  Have you ever prepared for a long trip with a  checklist to get everything packed?  Luckily, Jacky had packed extra bags of marshmallows because  one of the girls forgot the chocolate bars (what a bummer) and the bologna sandwiches were not my favorite.  Searching for sticks to strip and rub together to start the campfire took less work as we quickly ignited a smoldering roast. As a trooper, I swallowed down the melted well-done crispy marshmallows from the fire until my stomach sank.  As night became to unfold, two campers were assigned to each tent.  Again, we sprayed the repugnant repellant before going to sleep.  The tunes from a weeping bird and the chirps from the crickets rocked my thoughts to sleep.  I was grateful  for nature's lullaby.  At the crack of dawn (she must of been an egg), I woke up with wet shoes and socks because of the overnight rain.  It was if someone sprinkled some of God's holy water on my feet.

Nature's Heart

I woke up to another day trying to figure out my mixed pattern of clothes.  Jacky mentioned that we would be climbing the hill and camping overnight.  How terrifying was that!  I had no idea what that would be with the exception that I enjoyed walking.  My memory floats back to home as I remember walking with my siblings in tow, marching like ants.  We preceded my mother going to the stores.  It was the most uniformed military stance as we lined up by height and waited for her signal (voice of steel) to penetrate our winding ear canals.  Sometimes I was grateful for the summer break.  We were assigned light tasks such as carrying tools, mini tents, food, and outdoor gear.  I had the unpleasant honor of returning back to my bulging suitcase to search for my umbrella and raincoat.  How I wish it was packed with the required camping gears.  But, I brought what my mother only chose to afford.  My shoes (earthworms as they were called) were not picked and gnawed as there were finally useful for other than school.  A bit slippery as their soles had no grips, but I was able to dig them into the packed soil as we hiked.  The trees opened their arms and swayed above us showering rays from the sun who welcomed us onto the path.  Squirrels ran about and birds twittered as they flew above leaving me with a sense of belonging to Mother Earth.  She nurtured us with her warm kisses from the summer breeze and ruffled our hair with her hands, careful to pat each strand gently into place.  Finally, we arrived at the landing with Jacky able to guide us with her singing and smile of approval.  I placed my bag as instructed and sat on the ground folding my legs waiting for the next rules to be announced.